‘The Traitors’ Season 4 Episode 2 Recap: “The Death Conga”

Episode 2 of The Traitors begins the morning after the first murder, which means it’s the first breakfast spread of the season. Honestly, I really need a boutique hotel to offer a Traitors experience, even if it only entails eating fruit and eggs while an Alan Cumming impersonator smashes the portraits of my enemies. I would go in a heartbeat.

When we last saw the three known Traitors, Rob. R, Lisa Rinna, and Candiace Dillard Bassett, they were choosing from the Secret Traitor’s shortlist of possible murder victims. Rob R. being a Traitor himself, was shocked to find himself on the list, but it also helped narrow down the selection process, so he, Lisa and Candiace really only had three competitors to choose from: Ian Terry, Mark Ballas, or Eric Nam. As everyone files in for breakfast it becomes clear that Ian is the one who was murdered. Everyone knows by now that the “gamers” who hail from shows like Survivor and Big Brother, which Ian won, tend to be the most ruthless players, which puts a target on their backs, so while it’s disappointing, it’s not unexpected either.

While everyone speculates who could have committed the murder, a peculiar thing happens. Porsha Williams, while chatting with Ron Funches, gets a little tongue-tied and says, “I thought [the Traitor] could be Ian, but he’s the one I killed.”

“She said ‘I killed Ian,” Ron says. “Maybe that was a bit of a slip of the tongue or just a mistake, but it’s a little suspicious to me.” Later, Porsha says it again in front of even more people, including Michael Rapaport and Donna Kelce, drawing even more attention to herself. Is it possible she’s the Secret Traitor, and she’s just terrible at her job? I mean, realistically, the odds of her being the Secret Traitor are slim, but it definitely sets these three on high alert, and in the process, creates an alliance of trust between them… Although it seems like half the castle thinks that sweet Donna is a Traitor herself.

For this episode’s challenge, the crew is brought to the top of a majestic hill, from which they can see the castle wayyyy off in the distance. They’re told that they must pull three thrones all the way back to the castle, collecting gold along the way to add it to their prize pot. And not only that, the players who collect “shield tokens” along the way get to sit on the thrones, (players who find subsequent tokens can force the current occupant out of their seat) and the three players seated will earn immunity for the night.

In the end, Caroline Stanbury, Colton Underwood and Rob R. get the last shields, but Rob actually gives his shield to Yam Yam Arocho. When Yam Yam goes to sit on his throne, Michael throws a fit, whining about some (unspoken) rule that they all should have gotten to make their case for why thy deserve the shield the most, and he’s furious when Yam Yam sits down. Michael claims to be a superfan of this show, but if he really was, he’d know that this is a game where you really can trust no one and you have to be in it for yourself. Whining will get you nowhere. (I hate to say this, but you know what else will get you nowhere? Chivalrous behavior like Stephen Coletti’s, he gave up a shield to Dorinda because he didn’t want his teammates to have to carry him on the throne. This kind of nicety might be acceptable and encouraged in the real world, but not on this show!)

In another instance of Porsha being totally, weirdly Traitor-y, after the mission is over, she declares that the Faithfuls are looking for four Traitors. “There’s four of them,” she declares, even though usually there are only three. “You don’t know how many Traitors there are… unless you are one,” Ron says after Porsha’s latest slip, and at this point, he’s convinced that this season will be the first in history to banish a Traitor at their very first round table.

At the round table, Natalie Anderson is first to speak, saying that based on her instinct alone, she thinks Donna is a Traitor. But instinct ain’t got nothing on actual evidence. Ron breaks into the conversation to bring up Porsha, citing all of Porsha’s unfortunate verbal slips as evidence that she’s a Traitor. Porsha defends herself saying that she simply misspoke, to which Ron responds, “I think you’re lying.”

Candiace comes to Porsha’s rescue by trying to explain away the fact that she’s allowed to have a verbal slip-up (At first this seemed frustrating, that Candiace would try to help save a Faithful, but ultimately this was smart game play and made her look more Faithful in the long run). But after Candiace comes to Porsha’s defense, yet another verbal slip-up occurs. Michael, still salty about Yam Yam taking the shield, tries to implicate Yam Yam as a selfish player, and while explaining how he was one of the Faithfuls on the chopping block the previous night, Michael says he only escaped death because, “We killed Ian.” Immediately, everyone starts wondering why he said “we.”

When it comes time to vote, they’re split between Donna, Michael and Porsha, though Donna and Porsha are essentially tied the whole time (Lisa Rinna is the only Housewife to vote for Porsha, saying she was swayed by the evidence. Hooo, boy, this isn’t gonna sit well with the other Housewives who live and die by their loyalty to each other on this show. Not a strategy that has really worked for them in the past, though. Their devotion to the sisterhood has never really gotten them anywhere.) Ultimately, Porsha is banished, and I have to say once again that the fact that there’s a Secret Traitor in our midst really adds a thrilling new layer to the show, because as she steps into the Circle of Truth, there’s a sense of excitement in not knowing what she’s going to say. While I didn’t truly think Porsha was a Traitor, there’s always a chance, so I was tense up until the moment she declared herself a Faithful.

The episode takes a wild and hilarious turn when the Traitors learn that they’ve got to murder someone that night in plain sight, and the murder is a little more complicated and risky than past murders in plain sight. They’ve got to retrieve tarot cards from behind a painting in the kitchen – where so many other people are currently gathered – these cards have the faces of the Secret Traitor’s short list of murder victims. The three Traitors have to choose which person to murder and throw that card into the fireplace in the breakfast room, while being completely undetected. If they’re successful, they get to meet the Secret Traitor. If they can’t pull it off, there will be no murder at all which, if we’re being honest, is not a good look for the Traitors.

With so many people milling around and observing, Candiace wracks her brain trying to think of a distraction she can create. “Do I pass out? Do I burst into tears because I’m so distraught over Porsha?” No, she does what any sane person does to distract them all, she starts a Conga line.

Like a sassy pied piper, she leads everyone away from the kitchen so that Rob can steal the cards. It’s hilarious and ridiculous, and also, for gamers Rob C. and Tiffany, a totally obvious distraction. Rob C. is so weirded out by it that he even suggests that it’s the precursor to a murder in plain sight so he and Tiffany hole up away from the others so they can’t be murdered.

Rob R., now in possession of the tarot cards decides that the best way to consult with his fellow Traitor Lisa about who to kill would be to “teach her chess,” something no one would care to observe them doing together, so that they can have a private conversation. (Tara Lipinski seems to be observing them a little too closely though, and considering that she’s up for murder, I wish she would beat it.) With just seconds to go before their deadline runs out, Rob and Lisa burn one of the cards, without having consulted Candiace. Does that count, since she wasn’t consulted? Will they be successful in their mission? Will we learn the identity of the Secret Traitor so soon?! And more importantly, will this turn the game in favor f the suspicious gamers who could sense a murder in plain sight? We’ll have to wait until we meet again in the breakfast room for yet another delicious meal to find out.

Who could be the Secret Traitor?

Last episode, Eric Nam and Mark Ballas were the Faithfuls on the Secret Traitor’s shortlist. This episode, Kristen Kish, Tara Lipinski, Rob. C and Monet X Change are on the list. Assuming the Secret Traitor is not putting themself on the list, that narrows the field down a bit. I think the logic that a gamer is a Traitor is still solid, so I’m sticking with my initial guess, Yam Yam.

Liz Kocan is a pop culture writer living in Massachusetts. Her biggest claim to fame is the time she won on the game show Chain Reaction.