Boxing lifer Don Elbaum was a one-of-a-kind gem

Don Elbaum, one of the all-time Runyan-esque characters, lighter-weights boxer with a flattened nose as proof, boxing promoter, Boxing Hall of Famer and manufacturer of wild ideas, died last week at 94. 

I’d call him “If,” but not for his dreamy what-if? side, but for the two letters in the word if. In his case “if” stood for “insufficient funds.” But he knew I was a soft touch, so he’d put the bite on me. He suggested that I could profit because he’d pay me back — fat chance — while I could refund my check to him as a work expense. 

But he was worth the time and every dime. Sometimes he slept in the penthouse suite, other times in the bus station. Or police station. He was right out of central casting for Million Dollar Movie boxing flicks in black and white. 

And every time he called there was a story.