Man Upset After Girlfriend Shuts Down His Proposal at Their Best Friends’ Wedding

• A woman shared on Reddit that her boyfriend tried to propose at their close friends’ wedding, but she stopped him out of deference to the newlyweds
• Her boyfriend got upset, accusing her of ruining his proposal and making him “look like an a——“
• “I tried to explain that it’s not that I didn’t want to marry him. It was our best friends’ wedding and they deserve their moment,” the woman wrote.

A woman says her boyfriend attempted to propose in the middle of their best friends’ wedding, but she quickly stopped him out of respect for the newlyweds’ day. Now, he is accusing her of ruining the moment and making him look “like an a——.”

The 26-year-old woman detailed the drama in a post on Reddit, beginning by explaining that she and her boyfriend of three years recently attended the wedding of two of their closest friends. Leading up to the wedding, the OP (original poster) and her boyfriend, 24, had some “long talks” about their desire to get married and even looked at rings.

“So the chance of a proposal was more of a ‘when’ not ‘if,’ ” she noted.

When the couple got together with the bride and groom just a few weeks before their big day, the OP’s boyfriend “cracked a joke about proposing” at the wedding. “The to-be-groom joked back and said ‘that’d be funny as hell.’ This was followed by me and the to-be-bride both shutting it down; trying to be serious but also not thinking he was serious.”

As it turned out, he was serious. During their friends’ wedding reception, the OP’s boyfriend asked the DJ to play the couple’s favorite song.

“I look at him, smiling, and he’s looking around,” the OP recalled. “All of a sudden, he grabs a fork, stands up and begins clanging on a glass. Immediately, the whole dining room looks over.”

She continued: “I stand up and whisper the words ‘Not. Right. Now.’ His face drops and he yells a mix of ‘I’m sorry, I was just joking.’ After he sat back down, I verbatim said ‘let them have their moment, let’s make this our own.’ He wouldn’t even look at me.”

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The OP’s boyfriend then abruptly left the reception room without another word and didn’t respond to any of her calls or texts. He returned an hour later but the tension was palpable between the pair.

“The rest of the night was terrible. He looked like his dog just died, and I’m trying to make the best out of the night, but felt like I was just in his shadow. And the drive [home] was just quiet and awkward.”

Later, the OP’s boyfriend sent her a long text message “about how hard it was to get the ring, how he felt rejected by his closest person and that I embarrassed him.”

“I tried to explain that it’s not that I didn’t want to marry him. It was our best friends’ wedding and they deserve their moment. That we should create our own and not piggyback off theirs,” the OP recalled. “He got offended and said that if I wanted to marry him, I wouldn’t have stopped his proposal in front of everybody.”

Now that she has had more time to reflect on the situation, the OP feels conflicted and wonders if she did the right thing.

“I’ve never seen the appeal of proposing at someone else’s wedding and tried to handle the situation in a way that I felt was calm and chill,” she insisted, while adding, “But he’s very adamant that I ruined the proposal, made him look like an a——, and thus I’m the a——.”

She concluded her post by asking fellow Redditors: “Am I missing something? Should I admit I was wrong and have just let his proposal go at our friend’s wedding?”

In the comments section, many readers agreed that it was not the right time or place for the OP’s boyfriend to pop the question.

“It was bad taste for him to propose at the wedding. It would have been unfair to the bride and groom, not to mention tacky. He needs to get over it and move on,” one person wrote. “Out of all the possible scenarios to propose, he chose the worst option. You did the right thing by stopping him. No one knew he was going to propose, so he shouldn’t feel embarrassed.”

Another said: “This guy acted selfishly and childishly after he was already told by THE BRIDE HERSELF and you, his girlfriend, to not do it before the event. And then he does anyway and pouts like a four-year-old when he was rightfully shut down. Tell him to get over it.”

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Others were slightly more sympathetic to the boyfriend, acknowledging his hurt feelings.

“You wanted to be empathetic to your friends, but I think he’s just feeling a bit dejected at the moment. It’s not your fault — I mean, you even tried to say before how much you wouldn’t have wanted that sort of proposal,” one commenter wrote, suggesting, “I say you just give yourself both some space and wait for him to come around.”